The Old and the New

Ok, so I get that you all are not big “resolution” people, and I guess I really am not either.  I can’t remember the last time I made a true resolution outside the normal “I should eat better, exercise, drink less coffee and be nicer to people” standard thoughts.

But I think I do look back, and a little forward each year, just to keep it all on track.  And since this year was a big year of change I will be spending the next couple days walking backwards in my head.  Here is what I think I will probably be thinking about:  

I spent a whole year in a new and very different job that has changed my self identity more than I thought it would.  About a week ago, something snapped (OK, to be fair it was shot at me like a rubber band by my personal career counselor Beth) and I feel more like myself than I have all year.  I have adjusted to a new pace and a new culture, but hadn’t really felt like myself. I feel like myself this week. I have told a couple people that I was being nice all year to get them to like me so when I turned into the REAL Jenine that they could look back fondly on when I was nice.  I don’t think they believe me…yet.

I still want to exercise, and probably finally have time.  I just don’t know how.  I will keep trying to work on that.  I bought my standard new year cute exercise outfit, and we will see how that works.  I somehow convince myself that if I buy the right gear that will make me exercise.  I want to be stronger.  I do.  I want to deserve the cute exercise outfit and not just look like a poser.  I’m just not quite there…yet.

I will continue to work on keeping my emotions in check.  While I have historically been very stable, this year I just have days when I can’t keep it together.  I cried several times over the last 2 days looking back at 2006 and its life events.  As much as I have been bashing 2006, I guess I wasn’t as ready as I thought to move on…yet.

But with a new year, there is always new hope, isn’t there?

I am hopeful that I will keep feeling like myself at work, that I will actually exercise, and that I will take some time to celebrate my friends and family by spending copious amounts of quality time with them.  I think I will have help – the girls are turning into my conscience.  When did that happen?  Grace has been pushing me to exercise and cook dinner with her, and this morning when we woke up cold in camp where I would have jumped in the car to come home, Andra insisted that we bundle up and go on our traditional new years day hike to collect cool rocks. 





Happy 2007 – Even if you don’t make resolutions, I hope you haven’t given up thinking of something great you want to do this year, even if you aren’t sure how to do it…yet.

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