Author Archives: mostlyjenine

These days, it seems like it has been long enough that we shouldn’t miss Andra as much as we do.  These days, it seems terribly strange that it doesn’t seem so strange anymore.  But we do, and it is.Last week … Continue reading →

My life isn’t turning out quite like I expected.  If you dropped 1997 me into today, I would be happy.  I would be grateful for the life I have.  I would still be in love with Phil.  I would love … Continue reading →

When my Dad was first diagnosed with cancer, we talked about doing a “Live Like You’re Dying Tour” – a poor man’s version of the Bucket List, if you will.  But the reality was that he was quite concerned with being … Continue reading →

This week, I was out of town for work.  I had a nice time, and accomplished the purpose I was meant to at the meetings.  I also paddle boarded.  I parasailed.  And yet, I was disappointed to find how socially awkward … Continue reading →

I have spent so much of the last year being terrified that I have gotten quite used to it.  Every phone call, or lack of a phone call, or anytime someone calls and I miss it or they don’t answer … Continue reading →

2011 was something of a black hole.  I struggle to find memories of anything before about May, and I don’t know if the memories were made, and then vacuumed up in moments of loss or if the record button just … Continue reading →

I don’t know why one day is harder than another, sometimes.  Last week, I had one of the hard ones.  Okay, I probably set myself up, by starting my day with 2 cups of coffee and Andra’s homework binder.  Sitting … Continue reading →

As we started last week, rocketing forward towards the first anniversary of the worst days of our life, I was surprised to find that the whole week was dragging us down in sympathy for the days at the end of it. … Continue reading →